So You Had To Build A Time Machine

by Jason Offutt

Skid doesn’t believe in ghosts or time travel or any of that nonsense. A circus runaway-turned-bouncer, she believes in hard work, self-defense, and good strong coffee. Then one day an annoying theoretical physicist named Dave pops into the seat next to her at her least favorite Kansas City bar and disappears into thin air when she punches him (he totally deserved it).

Now, street names are changing, Skid’s favorite muffins are swapping frosting flavors, Dave keeps reappearing in odd places like the old Sanderson murder house—and that’s only the start of her problems.

Something in the world has gone wrong. Terribly wrong. Absolutely &#*$&ed up.

Someone has the nastiest versions of every conceivable reality at their fingertips, and they’re not afraid to smash them together. With the help of a smooth-talking haunted house owner and a linebacker-sized Dungeons and Dragons-loving baker, Skid and Dave set out to save the world from whatever scientific experiment has sent them all dimension-hopping against their will.

It probably means the world is screwed.

Jason Offutt writes books. This is infinitely better than what his father trained him to do, which was to drink beer and shout at the television. He is best known for science fiction, such as his end-of-the-world zombie novel Bad Day for the Apocalypse (a curious work that doesn’t include zombies), his paranormal non-fiction like Chasing American Monsters (that does), and his book of humor How to Kill Monsters Using Common Household Objects. He teaches university journalism, cooks for his family, and wastes much of his writing time trying to keep the cat off his lap. You can find more about Jason at his website, There are no pictures of his cat Gary, and it serves him right.

Twitter: @TheJasonOffutt

Instagram: thejasonoffutt

HC ISBN: 9780744300147
TP ISBN: 9780744300161
LP ISBN: 9780744300352
EBook ISBN: 9780744300178
Audio ISBN: 9780744300208

“Unlikely heroes, unwitting villains, and cutting-edge scientific speculation abound. VERDICT: Offutt (Chasing American Monsters) has created an engaging, quirky, somewhat scientifically believable scenario…”Library Journal 

“Offutt’s plotting delights as the consequences of the characters’ trips through time ripple forward to build a satisfying puzzle.” Publishers Weekly 

“A hilarious sci-fi adventure for true geeks and everyone who appreciates a well-timed pop culture reference, a timey-wimey puzzle populated by memorable characters.” Jeff Somers, author of Ustari Cycle and The Avery Cates series

“When time and dimensions become malleable, every possibility has a probability. And it adds up to a wild adventure. I’ll never think of ‘Do you know the muffin man?’ the same again.” Dr. David Richardson, Associate Professor of Physics at Northwest Missouri State University

“An adventure for the kid in any of us who has ever wanted to save the day, sword fight, or even face our biggest fears head on.” Bin Blogs Books

“A unique twist on time travel. If you are tired of the “everyone knows this is how time travel works” novels then you will be a happy camper when you read “So You Had to Build a Time Machine”. A  carny and a theoretical physicist walk into a bar and set in to play a time space continuum conundrum. A good read.” The Cincy Underground

“I laughed out loud throughout the book, and I couldn’t stop turning the pages to see what would happen next. The novel puts a fresh spin on many of the traditional time travel tropes, or it uses its characters to address time-space cliches head on with hilarious results. The book was funny, zany, and a wonderful escape from reality. I loved everything about this light, unpredictable adventure.” Prose and Paws